Stop The Madness... Class Act prt 1

Stop the madness. Like, really.
Why are we females always fighting EACH OTHER?
I have come a long way from where I used to be, and being a little more enlightened than I was before, I'm looking around and shaking my head. Im on my journey to become a "class act".There was a time when I didnt have the highest self-esteem, and was threatened by girls who had qualities that I admired or wished I had. So in the company of my friends, I would pick out the chicks I had problems with and systematically Tear Them Apart! From their hairstyle to their shoes, the way they were built...any imperfections I had seen I would exploit to the fullest extent.And would use my gift with words to make a person feel lower than an ant... Then a little later, after I had my own Come-up and didnt feel so bad, I picked on people who didnt have it like I had it, who couldnt "freak" an outfit like I freaked it, and maybe werent as cute as me. Lookin back no matter where I was on the popularity food chain, I was a pretty nasty person. But, things change, time heals all wounds and I look around and see my sisters (all of you!) doing the same things I did and worse. And if you aren't, I applaud you. Now, there is a difference between hating on girls for no reason and disliking them for a genuine one...and let me tell you
A MAN BETTER NOT BE ONE OF THEM!
every day I find myself trying to be a better person, a classy lady. We hear that word alot but alot of women take the word and twist the meaning. And, if you have to call yourself classy before anybody else does, you still have some work to do, lady. For the ladies that maybe have some issues deep down inside and jealousy is your problem, you dont have to admit it to that person. But you can from here on out stop treating them like your enemy and maybe find out what it is that you can do to better yourself. Sistas, another thing that is CLASSLESS is the way we treat ourselves when it comes to men...PLEASE let that "wifed-up" thing go! because unless you have a ring on your finger, you are really no better than the "side-chick" or "jumpoff" because the nigga is still DISRESPECTING you. Also, if you got your man by taking him from anotha sista, you better beware. How you got him is how you will lose him, and Karma is a bad,bad, bitch.Another thing. CLOSE YOUR MOTHERFUCKING LEGS!IF you MUST get some, go buy a toy. We all understand that caking and cuddling with a dude can lead to some stuff, and we all fall down. But if you keep on TRIPPING and Falling, you better take them Fuck Me Pumps off and go sat your hot ass down somewhere.And if you bragging because he's trickin on you, what does that make you? A TRICK! stop braggin on it... Once a dude gets it, i mean...he done got it and its up to him now to decide when to get rid of ur ass, cuz we all know the double standards.I hate to bore you, but the story Lysistrata by Aristophanes is about all the women in thier kingdom cracking down on their dudes and getting whatever they wanted done by doin one thing: Cutting off the coochie!(its really effective, I PROMISE!lol) To my ladies that are established, have their own things, look good, doing it big: I APPLAUD YOU! I LOVE YOU, GIRL! but dont look down on the next chick. If I see anybody else on their pages talkin about how they "SHIT" on "these hoes", I'm gonna go crazy. Do you think there is something cute about people visualizing boo-boo runnin all outta your ass because you look good? eh-eh. Besides, shit stinks, and so will your attitude if you keep talkin like that.Now if I sound like I'm preachin, y'all aint gotta go get out your afro picks for a natural and run around bra-less watchin Waiting to Exhale...
but can we attempt to make a change at least? Even if a chick did something to piss you off and now u dont like her ass, forgive her. Maybe she was having a bad day.Help a ho get off the floor if she fell instead of laughin! (I say ho in the most loving way) when you walk down the street, smile at the next girl u see instead of mean muggin, even IF THATS WHAT SHE DOES.Stop fighting like bitches in the street (that shit aint cute!)Rome wasnt built in a day...and next time you go to the club and you look all the way right, say you REPRESENT for the girls that cant do it like you yet instead of SHITTING (eee) on the ones who dont look so good. To all the girls who say they dont fuck with other girls, they only have guy friends...shut your trap. you only have guy friends execpt for all the BESTIES that you effin posin in pics with, and besides a nigga can be "yo nigga" all he want and he STILL can talk about yo ass the same way he talk about people in front of you.So to all the girls that I've pissed off ever, my bad, sis. And to all my future and present friends, I'm blessed to have you.I know this line is a cliche', but the past is history, the future is a mystery, and today is a gift! Enjoy it! Why do you think they call it the "present"?
So let's Stop the Madness!

Peek in the life of an Athelete's Wife....

"Stacks on Deck
Wrist full of ice...
Ima go & get this degree
Then shawty I'ma buy whatever I like....."
I've been walkin around singin my remixed ditty-bop in my head for some time now...and like I begin every entry...I know, I know i havent wrote BUT...lol. No explanations this time, dudes. Just know I actually have been following everybody's day-to-days on my sidekick. I have 5 tests coming up and am not as panicked as I think I should be about it....probably because I'm frustrated about other things like life period...but such is life. Willie (as mentioned is past blogs) has gone to Morehouse, Hip-Hop is DEAD, and I dont too much feel like entertaining any other people, so my love life is a running joke between me and my roommate as well. But the joke I wanted to share with you guys was my whirlwind 5 second affair w/ a UK jock, a basketball drafter that just came here...After facebook stalking will and seeing he was MORE than enjoying his time w/his newfound "Georgia Peaches", I was pissed, mostly out of jealousy. I cut political science and went to lunch with my old high school friend Louis, something i almost never do because one, I dont eat lunch and two, I'm a hermit and dont Gel well w/ the black folk here. As Louis went off to find some nasty piece of corn-fed unhealthy chicken to masticate (Chik-Filet of course!), I stood alone, fidgety and adjusting my clothes, and felt a pair of eyes on me. Have you ever felt that? When the naps on the back of your neck prickle, and its not because you need a perm? Well, when I located them, I was taken aback to find the specimen attached to them. The brother was fine. Caramel, 6ft plus and starin at me like I was dessert, which always wins you points...lol. Never a shy Southern Bell, I walked over and introduced myself.
After tellin me in a thick accent his name and also findin out we had a class togetha, he finally told me his claim to fame was because he was drafted to our basketball team, and he was originally from Baton Rouge, Louisiana. (Creole Magic! Yummy!lol)so we exchanged numbers and parted ways. I felt vindicated because of Will, and flabbergasted because an Athelete wanted to talk to me! Im no Kim kardashian (im built way thicker, thanks! lol) or Vanessa Bryant! I'm a big chocolate glamazon! WTF? So for the next week he walked me to class, out and around campus, and texted incessantly, and it was mighty cute. It felt even better to know that it wasnt the sun burnin my black ass, it was the envious stares from other girls! But the cuteness fizzled out when Creole Magic Finally revealed his intentions (duh, you knew this story was goin somewhere!) In the middle of class he handed me a note in small scrawley handwriting asking me 1)When we were gonna do it because i was fine as hell and he "couldnt wait to put it on my thick azz" and 2)did I have stretch marks? because they were sexy as hell and I looked like I had a lot. SIDEBAR: Was that shit supposed to be a compliment? What the hell is sexy about stretch marks? Well hell, if u like it I love it....I had to kindly but Firmly tell his ass that I'm nobody's piece, jump-off, or any ish like that and I was here to get an education, not to be any body's future baby mama or arm candy (though it was nice for a lil while...) Creole Magic seemed unfazed...that is, untill I noticed he wasnt following me to my next class like a puppy dog any longer..the icing on the cake was that weekend, the weekend of the greatest house party I've been to so far, the defining (finally) moment of college fun for me.(i WILL write about my bad party experiences later...) Right in front of me, he was dance-humping some skinny chick that looked like a burnt prayin mantis, the way she was bent, twisted, and angled around his 6'6 frame. I couldnt say much but could only sigh, especially when he made it a point to get the number of a girl who's dress was hiked up over her lumpy behind and stretched out across her cut, and sweat making her weave bangs come loose in the front. (I wish I had a picture.) I could only walk away sayin, "my brother, my brother......"

So Now I do understand what the allure of being an athelete's wife/girlfriend is. To know that everybody is grilling you, wishing they had a chance wit your man (though I KNOW he wasnt mine, you know what I mean. To walk around wearing his jersey proudly, cuz u know if both of y'all play your cards right, his jersey really will be important, and you'll be draped in something way better than his funky old shirt....Still, the allure of being draped in that same shyt because I bought it turns me on even more....one of the reasons why I'm still here.
And besides being a roaring hip-hop feminist and refusing to give it up to someone i dont know because my mama taught me better, I just like Smart dudes, nerds who are going somewhere, smart brothers, since I'm a smart sista. I never knew how much I appreciated all Hip-Hop's educational accolades, or Willie's intelligence or wit, until I had somebosy whisperin in my ear in class...."Aye sexxy gull (yes he says gull!), you know I'ma be copyin off you on dis test!"
Great. Now this Scooter's future is in my hands. If I let him copy, he'll scrape by and pass, possibly become very known and get drafted to the NBA, and set up yet another ignorant mexican video girl up for life in the future....and if I dont let him copy, And y'all kno his ass'll fail, I'll b contributing to yet another black man dropping/getting kicked out of school, not getting a job, and or contributing to crime or more having impoverished black children than Hurrican Katrina. Decisions, decisions.
And people wonder why it's been said that black women are the mules of the world. lol.

Secrets of a Southern Belle...Who's Independence day?

Definitely not mine. When this day came into fruition, me and my peeps were still in the field singin "oh lordy, pick a bail uh cotton...oh lorday pick a bail uh hay...." so it wasnt much to celebrate. But since it was "independence day" i broke my dependence to my hairweave and let my head rest for the weekend if that means anything. I did go to a wedding, though. LET ME TELL YOU WHY I WAS DEAD-WRONG FOR ATTENDING THE WEDDING.MY HOISH CHICKENS CAME HOME TO ROOST. The couple were two people that I used to work with at a restaurant. I wont say their names, cuz I can get killed for what I'm about to share with you guys.Three years ago, at the tender age of sixteen, I carried on in an episode w/ the groom, then 24. ( yeah he's a nasty child molester, but it took me a couple years to figure that out, and how naive I was)anyway, I was still close with his family, becasue we all worked together and I went to high school with some of his cousins.They were the ones who begged me to come. What the hell would I look like ( the other woman thats what) going to his wedding? If it looks like a ho, walks like a ho, and smiles like a ho, it aint chicken. Also in attendance was my ex Courtney, who the Groom claims as his cousin.(i didnt know that until later.) He just moved here from AL not too long ago, and in that time, managed to cheat on me with every janky white bitch you can make up! So I didnt want to go alone, and I also didnt want to go with anybody ugly, or who knew about the situation. I had to come up with somebody...so I came up with Dez, the cheating boyfriend I've mentioned in past posts. H'es 6'6, dominican, indian, and black, and not the brightest crayon in the box. (HE WAS PERFECT!) so we got there and of course, all eyes were on us....heeheehee. and that was including my decidely new NONfriend, Krystal. Krystal attends the same school as me, is as intelligent, and extremely beautiful. The only resaon I tolerate her is becasue she's Chocolate and beautiful, and represents for us!( 'ill explain that story later) In any case, her social climbing ass was there, and deicded to give me the cold shoulder. (we in the south/midwest, and u are rude as hell if u dont speak, even if u hate each other!) so it was no surprise that karma breezed past us in the reception hall and she got knocked on her ass. (video below.enjoy.heehee)

So finally everybody settled down and the wedding began. It was perfect, short and sweet, just like I like it, and soo touching, actually. No matter how much hatred I felt towards the groom for things that happened, and pity i felt for the scrawney, chicken legged redbone bride, they didnt care. It was all about them, the way it should be. And a glimmer of jealousy sparked in my chest and spread untill I was completely green under neath my electric blue dress. I'm very afriad that I wont find THE ONE....nevertheless I'll always have me...so after the wedding everyone was passing out drinks, and my ex Coutney the Cheater was manning the Table and wouldnt give me one. (punk bitch)somehow i managed to finagle one anyway.So as I swtiched my flyy ass out the door to drop dez off and quite early, there was no need to stay and schmooze, thats just wrong) I didnt feel half as akward and wrong as I thought...WHat would one say about that?